There are lots of reasons you may be considering introducing sex toys into your relationship. Your love life may have turned stale, or maybe your sexual chemistry is off the charts, and you want to keep it that way! Whatever the reason, we're here to help you make it happen.
Benefits of Using Sex Toys
Incorporating sex toys into your bedroom antics can benefit your relationship in many ways, not just increased pleasure! These boosts to your brain and body may help convince your partner it's a great idea.
Increased Intimacy with Your Partner
Using sex toys can take your relationship to the next level, beyond just physically! Exploring new things with your partner is a great way to connect. New, shared experiences can increase your bond for a deeper understanding of one another.
Improved Sex Life
Whether you've always had a very fulfilling sexual relationship or your sex life is dwindling, sex toys can spice things up in your relationship. Introducing sex toys can help both you and your partner get the specific pleasure you need from sex and increase your chance of orgasm.
The Physical Health Benefits of Sex Toys
Pleasure may be the goal when you start introducing sex toys to your relationship, but it's not the only benefit! There can be advantages to your health from using sex toys. A healthy sex life is good for the body, and using tools can help improve your sex life and boost your health. Sex toys can help with premature ejaculation, as well as low testosterone and loss of libido in men. Studies also suggest the use of sex toys can help strengthen the pelvic floor through increased muscle use in the area.
Psychological Perks
As well as the benefits to your body, there is evidence to suggest that using toys can improve your mental health. Sex toys can help reduce stress and improve sleep. Great sex makes your body release dopamine and endorphins, and sex toys can help make that happen. Studies show that a positive relationship with sex can boost self-image and self-esteem and has also been proven to reduce performance anxiety in both men and women.
How to Suggest Using Sex Toys to Your Partner
You've come to the conclusion you want to incorporate sex toys into partner play, but you're stuck on how to initiate it. Inviting your partner to participate in sex toy fun can be exciting or nerve-wracking, so here's our tips on how to take the next step.
Establish Your Wants
Before you start the sex toy chat, ask yourself why you want to do this with your partner. Do you want to try something new? Is your sex life missing the mark? Perhaps you feel like it will take your relationship to the next level! Once you feel confident in what you want to get out of it, you'll feel more confident getting your partner on board.
Establishing what you don't want is just as important as what you do, so think about what your boundaries are and how to communicate that. Perhaps you're interested in trying vaginal toys but not anal play, or maybe you want to use toys but only when you're in control of them. Having the conversation with yourself first will help you have the conversation with your partner.
Make It Sexy
Introducing sex toys into your relationship can demonstrate how much you love and trust your partner and your excitement to start this new adventure with them. Remember, sexy toys are for pleasure, and even the conversations around them can be pleasurable. Talking is an act of foreplay! Starting the conversation can start to get your pulses racing, so describe what you'd like to do to your partner and, more specifically, what toys you'd like to use.
Make Them Feel Heard
Approaching the conversation may feel daunting, but it can be well worth it. It's crucial to consider how to broach the topic without making your partner feel they are underperforming or lacking in any way. Be sensitive to their feelings and respectful of their response.
If your partner has some reservations about introducing sex toys, it's important to validate their feelings and talk through their concerns. For some people, there is a stigma around sex toy use which they may be dealing with. Setting clear boundaries can help your partner feel valued and respected. If your partner has no prior experience or knowledge of sex toys, they may feel intimidated at the thought of them. Knowing the different sex toy options available could help your partner feel more comfortable and more easily visualise how it may look in your relationship.
Make sure they feel reassured that it's something you want to do together — you are not replacing them! You can share some of the benefits we've mentioned above and explain how this could be amazing for your relationship.
Keep It Light!
Keep the conversation playful and try to approach it with a sense of humour. If you're both relaxed, it will go much more smoothly. Sex and partnered play should be fun!
How to Find the Right Sex Toys for Your Relationship
Sex toys come in many different shapes and sizes, so there are a few things to consider when introducing them into couples’ play.
Size and Comfort
There's no one-size-fits-all when it comes to sex toys, and what feels great for you may not do it for someone else. As a beginner, it's a good idea to start with smaller size toys and gradually move to larger ones as you become more comfortable. Toys with soft silicone surfaces and rounded edges can be more comfortable as you start out.
It's also recommended to start with low-intensity toys and settings before gradually increasing as you become more comfortable. You may want to experiment in solo play to find your comfort levels and limits with toys before introducing your first sex toy into partnered play.
Types of Sex Toys
A huge range of sex toys is available, so this beginner's guide will help you with the basics.
External Sex Toys
External sex toys are designed for external stimulation, such as clitoral stimulation. Examples of external sex toys include bullet vibrators and wand vibrators, designed to increase sensations on the clitoris or testicles — or anywhere that feels good! External toys aren't limited to the genital areas and can create a sense of arousal and feelings of pleasure when used anywhere on the surface of the body, like on the nipples.
Internal Sex Toys
Internal sex toys are intended for internal stimulation like vaginal or anal penetration. Dildos, for example, are internal sex toys used by inserting them into the vagina or anus. Prostate massagers and G-spot vibrators are also internal stimulation toys, as well as butt plugs and anal beads. Double-ended dildos are versatile internal sex toys ideal for partner play.
Male Sex Toys
Male sex toys such as cock rings are designed for men and people with penises. Cock rings provide constriction and stimulation during penetrative sex. As well as penis rings, other sex toys made for men's pleasure include a prostate massager, which is inserted into the anus and stimulates the prostate to increase blood flow and sensitivity.
EXPLORE OUR RANGE OF SEX TOYS FOR MEN.
Remote Control Toys
These toys are usually wearable, hands-free sex toys. The remote control is used to turn them on and off and control the vibration intensities. Our remote-controlled bullet vibrator can be slipped into your underwear and controlled by the remote for either self-play or handed to your partner for them to take control.
How to Use Sex Toys for the First Time
Whether it's your first time using sex toys or just your first time using them as a couple, here are our top tips.
Remember the Lube
Lube can be just as important as the sex toys when it comes to partner play. Lubricants can help increase comfort, especially for the insertion of internal sex toys. As well as helping things get moving, finding the right lube can also intensify sensations and pleasure. Experiment with water-based lube for a natural feel, tingly lube for increased sensitivity, flavoured lubes for oral fun and any other lube you want to try!
Experiment with Positions
Just like any sex, experimentation will help you find your preferences. Find what works for you and your partner by experimenting with different positions and techniques. Incorporating sex toys can introduce you to new positions you hadn't previously tried or positions you didn't previously get pleasure from, but now you have a helping hand. Read our tips on The Best Sex Positions That Use Sex Toys for inspiration.
Communicate with Your Partner
Conversation isn't just for before the sex begins. Ensure you continue to communicate with your partner to see what feels good, what is comfortable, and what they want more of. Use this opportunity to express your own desires to ensure you're both achieving a pleasurable experience.
Materials and Features
When choosing a sex toy, prioritise body-safe materials such as silicone. Look for toys that are hygienic and non-toxic to ensure safe use. You may also want to opt for features like quiet settings and maximum noise levels for privacy and uninterrupted play.
Good Clean Fun
Cleaning your sex toy before and after use is really important to make sure you're having fun in a safe way. Use mild soap and warm water to clean non-electronic sex toys. Some toys may require a specific sex toy cleaner designed for effective and safe cleaning. After cleaning, ensure the toy is completely dry before storing it to prevent bacterial growth.
Keeping your sex toys clean is important for your personal health and to prolong the lifespan of your sex toys. For full guidance, check out our blog, How to Clean and Care for Your Sex Toys.
Buying Your First Sex Toy
Shopping for sex toys can be just as nerve-wracking as talking about them, but we've made it easy for you to take the plunge. You can buy sex toys online with ease, without the need to go into a high street store.
Our discreet packaging guarantees privacy, allowing the excitement to be yours and yours alone. We also offer next-day delivery, so you don't have to wait! Once you decide to invest in your sexual journey, before you know it, one of our stunning premium gift boxes could be landing on your doorstep.
Unboxing your new toys is just the start of the fun!
Still Not Sure Where to Start Using Sex Toys?
If you want to leave it to the experts, we can help get you started on your journey. When you buy the La La Land Mystery Sex Toy Gift Box we'll send you a personalised collection of sex toys based on your answers to our short questionnaire. This includes an option for using toys with your partner so you can guarantee we'll include toys ideal for sharing the fun!
Our experts will use the information you provide to handpick the toys best suited to your desires. Some you might be familiar with, and some might offer new experiences. Be as honest as you can so we can make sure your box is tailor-made for maximum pleasure.
And if you were still on the fence, Bed Nerdz stands behind the quality and performance of our toys, so we offer a lifetime guarantee. We believe in the durability of our products and want you to feel confident in your investment.
NOW YOU'RE READY TO INTRODUCE PARTNER PLAY; DISCOVER THE GOLDEN STATE COLLECTION TODAY.